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The Monday Morning Question: Recommendations Gone Awry
Monday, January 26, 2009
I have barely even looked at my blog for a few weeks as I've been too busy nursing a snit over my much-needed video and photo software conking out on me. But since that issue seems to be fixed -- thanks to the fine folks at PC Help Forum -- I decided to come back and participate in this blogging life.
Today's question is pretty general: What movies have you recommended to others that didn't go over well?
Years ago I loaned my copy of "Arsenic and Old Lace" to my parents. They were both old enough to have seen the film in theaters when it was originally released but hadn't, and had not seen it on TV since then, either. Now I personally love the movie, mainly because it so clearly evokes the feeling of a breezy, cool fall night. Also, it's set during Halloween. It has Priscilla Lane, Peter Lorre, and Jack Carson. And who can resist the charms of Cary Grant acting like a manic chicken?
My parents, apparently. They hated the movie. Not just hated but loathed. Despised. Shunned. Were obviously embarrassed to be the parents of a woman who thought "Arsenic and Old Lace" was a good movie. That is not hyperbole, but I should qualify that by mentioning that my parents were constantly embarrassed by my mere existence anyway, so the "Arsenic and Old Lace" incident just made it worse.
I related this anecdote on rec.arts.movies.past-films once already, and since it's Usenet -- where no anecdote goes unpunished -- another poster said he wanted to congratulate my parents and spend the holidays with them. I so wanted to tell the guy that he'd need a Ouija board and a shovel since they were long since dead, but I didn't. Somehow I managed to be civil. But the guy and I are friendly now, although I don't think I'll ever forget the incident.
What I'm saying is that I've got so much damn baggage associated with "Arsenic and Old Lace" now that I'm not sure I could ever watch it again. Optimum failure was achieved by my lending the tape to my parents, and afterwards talking about that incident on Usenet.
Have you had any horror stories like this you want to share? And heck, if you had some epic success suggesting a movie to someone, tell us that, too. Just because I'm a bitter, bitter woman doesn't mean you have to be.
Oh, and a side note, here's the DVD cover of "Arsenic and Old Lace", complete with FrankenCary Creature -- no neck, misshapen arm, soulless smile and dislocated leg. And do his shoes even match? I guess the intern assigned to create the cover didn't like the movie either.
Posted by Stacia at 2:32 AM 17 comments
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17 comments:
In my days working at Ball...er, Blockbuster Video I once recommended The Thin Blue Line to a customer who wanted to see "something different." A couple of days later he was back in the store and chewing me out because "that movie had nothin' but talkin' in it."
I also recommended the splendidly underrated Eve's Bayou to a girl I knew in Morgantown, WV and her sidekick. Both told me it was the worst movie they'd ever seen, even though the two women had a real fetish for Southern Gothic tales.
My father and sister thought Fargo was terrible when they first saw it on my recommendation. Since that time, however, they have seen it on multiple occasions and now consider it a favorite. (I threw this last one in only to add a happy ending.)
As for Arsenic and Old Lace, it's not quite as good as its reputation would suggest but it's still a favorite of mine. My main grief with the movie is that Raymond Massey is a poor substitute for Boris Karloff--had Karloff done the picture, it would be a black comedy masterpiece.
I agree about Massey. I hate him in "Arsenic and Old Lace". HAAAAAAAAAATE.
I had a horrible experience renting "Magnolia" at Blockbuster. This crazy clerk girl had watched the film for a church group and they had apparently decided to see it entirely as a straight modern-day Biblical morality tale, and she would NOT shut up about it. She was spoiling bits and being irritating and kind of crazy in that uber-conservative-wingnut way, and even co-workers were trying to hint to her that she should shut up.
Conclusion: 25% of people who enter a Blockbuster lose their sanity.
My sons grew up with "Dad's plotless B&W movies", and have a residual distrust of my choices. I've struck out so many times with recommendations, I've given up. In fact, I don't even have to suggest 'em any more, they remember the titles from their days of misspent youth and hit me over the head about it anyway. "The Strange Love of Martha Ivers" was the last one savaged, just last week, and this from the film school grad. Sigh.
At least they hold their tongues if they're watching something I've chosen on TV at my place - Kay Francis month was quite enjoyable for just this reason. I haven't struck out completely, but I have pretty much given up recommending films. 'Course it is funny to hear from a buddy from my college days, who now attends a "Classic Film Night" in his town, and he enthuses about this wonderful old French B&W version of Beauty and the Beast - I couldn't've paid him to see Cocteau with me in high school or college when I was seeing a lot films my pals thought were strange or boring.
I went to a late, late showing with one of 'em that had Browning's "Freaks" in the line-up. When we finally left the theater, he told me flat out, "You liked that fucked up old movie? I'm never going to another movie with you again." The word got around. Fortunately, I had a film-going girl as a friend who would see anything, and dragged me to few choice choices of her own. I think she made up for all the gripes, old and new, though - she thought it would be fun to see something called a samurai film, and sometime later agreed to see a silent film with this girl whose hair was in a shiny black bob.
I gave a guy at work "The Cranes Are Flying" last Friday, wonder how that'll turn out. Touch wood.
Count me in as one who doesn't like Arsenic and Old Lace as much as he's supposed to. I love Cary Grant. In a wholesome, manly fashion. I love dark humor and screwball comedy. But I always felt Arsenic was ... forced. Perhaps they were too comfortable with the stage version. Maybe I need to see it multiple times to really appreciate and love it. Give me Topper instead. Or North by Northwest. Or Bringing Up Baby, or Father Goose.
This doesn't quite answer the question, but I deliberately have never, ever recommended favorite films to anyone because I can't stand the idea of having my hallowed, brain-engraved, heart embalmed tonics sullied by the risk of insults and indifference. I prefer they remain my pure, pristine pleasures. Of course here I can be a bit more trusting, in that evoking the name El Brendel will not instantly label me a hopeless parolee from Der Nutten Haus.
As for ARSENIC, I find it tolerable enough, even though the absence of Karloff is painful. I also think Bob Hope would've outdone Cary Grant in the role. Ah well.
P.S. Your existence means a lot to us, Queen Stacia!
I personally love Arsenic and Old Lace however my prior suggestions of Notorious and Mulholland Drive have caused some people to call me crazy. (They felt the movies were too slow and boring)
I once let a female friend of mine borrow Dead Ringers. "That was uhh... Hmmm... Uhh... Disgusting."
Well, like they say, know your audience. And you really have to know them. For me to think about recommending a film, I first ask what they like - if none match my tastes, I talk about the weather. On the other hand, if there are a couple of matches, I'll give it a shot. Thinking about it, I'm probably 75-25 or the 75 is just being polite. And to go completely against my advice, I recommend to anyone reading this, King of Masks.
Have fun.
It's strange with Arsenic and Old Lace, either people love it or they hate it, never in between. I personally love that movie, and it is actually one of my favorite Cary Grant movies.
I've tried time and again showing a movie to someone and where they either never got around to watch it, or didn't really care for it.
I once loaned a friend "The Abominable Dr Phibes". I thought it was his sort of movie (He's campy, fussy, flamboyant) well, I was wrong. Not only did he hate it, I got a LECTURE on why he hated it.
I tried again- loaned him "Half Shot at Sunrise". Well, I guess I should have known with THAT one...
Thanks for the kind words, King! If you're King and I'm Queen, then who is Jack? Oh, probably Jack Pendarvis. Duh.
Mr Salami, rest assured that everyone loves Cary Grant in a wholesome, manly fashion. Your manliness is confirmed.
I'm shocked to find people didn't like "Notorious", "Fargo", "Martha Ivers" or "Dr Phibes". Shocked! Well, not that shocked, I guess, but still somewhat disappointed.
Operator99, I really thought I knew my parents well enough to know they'd like "Arsenic". It was the only movie I ever lent them. I did give dad a copy of "Magnificent 7" and mom a copy of "Close Encounters of the Third Kind" and they liked both of those, but the third movie was apparently NOT the charm. Sigh.
Oh yeah, KING OF JAZZ, you're talking my kind of talk. In the Oxford American, I suggested that BABY DOLL might have been more interesting if directed by a proficient hack and starring Bob Hope and Dean Martin (each of whom could play either male role). I'd keep Carroll Baker, though! Funny to see Cocteau's BEAUTY AND THE BEAST mentioned. In my youthful days I showed it to two women who got a big kick out of saying, "Courage!" in a Bert Lahr voice whenever the beast appeared, because they thought he looked like the Cowardly Lion. (My wife did the same thing every time Mariah Carey appeared in GLITTER, but that was okay.) Also, once some people were LAUGHING at the end of SHANE! And I had to turn and hide my manly tears. Finally, I went to see THE WRONG MAN at a museum in Atlanta, and the supercilious film introducer told the audience beforehand that it was better enjoyed as "camp" (!!!) so they (everyone!) proceeded to giggle and simper and smirk all the way through it and ruined my chance to see one of my favorite small Hitchcock pictures on the big screen. You know what really made them giggle? When Vera Miles suffered a devastating mental breakdown. Thanks a lot, film introducer!
Welcome Back Stacia!
Back when my wife and I were dating, I recommended this very same movie to her and she HATED it. To this day if I mention Arsenic and Old Lace to my wife she rolls her eyes and gives me a disapproving "pffft!". This is a movie that people either love or hate, there is no middle ground. Luckily, my track record up to that point had been sterling so it was merely a bump in the road, but still, I was sad to have my record tarnished.
Stacia, this is to let you know that since I have been tapped for a Premio Dardos Award this week, I now pass the award along to you, in my admiration for your blog.
“The Dardos Award is given for recognition of cultural, ethical, literary, and personal values transmitted in the form of creative and original writing. These stamps were created with the intention of promoting fraternization between bloggers, a way of showing affection and gratitude for work that adds value to the Web.”
The rules:
“1) Accept the award by posting it on your blog along with the name of the person that has granted the award and a link to his/her blog.
2) Pass the award to another five blogs that are worthy of this acknowledgement, remembering to contact each of them to let them know they have been selected for this award.”
Please feel free to take the badge from my blog at
Skeins of Thought.
And please keep writing! Arsenic and Old Lace makes me laugh, even if it isn't great cinema. According to one of his autobiographies, Raymond Massey didn't like his performance in it either.
All the best,
Moira Finnie
I watched a TV movie about Abbott and Costello with Buddy Hackett and Harvey Korman. The portrayal bothered me enough that I can't watch Abbott and Costello any more. They were once one of my favorites. My mom and dad had such ridiculously different tastes that I could recommend anything to them and one of them would like it but it wouldn't always be the one I thought. Mom loved Pulp Fiction but Dad hated it and I would have bet my house that it would have been the other way around.
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